Don’t Be “That Person” Who Tells The Same Story Over And Over And...

A few weeks ago, I told a friend how blessed I feel to still have my mom with us. I visit her in Tennessee about once a month; we spend two or three days together and have a lot of fun. My friend then shared that he also visits a family member. He goes on to say that when this person starts telling the same story for the third time in as many hours, it’s time to leave.

We all know a friend or family member who repeats the same story several times, sometimes even more than once in a single visit. Rule of thumb, if you can’t think of “that person” in your social circle who tells the same story over and over, most likely “that person” is you.

So how do you avoid becoming “that person,” or at least kicking the can further down the road? The best way to avoid re-living the same old stories is to start living new ones.

To share new stories, we must be intentional about making new friends and engaging in new activities with old ones.

Friendships are not just a pleasant addition to our lives; they are essential for our well-being. Research consistently shows that maintaining strong social bonds becomes increasingly vital as we age. Studies from the National Institute on Aging reveal that those who keep active social lives experience better physical health, improved cognitive function, and longer lifespans than those who tend to isolate themselves.

When I talk about making new friends, I am not just talking about making friends with other seventy-year-old, middle-class white guys who have a background in business and happen to be Christians. There isn’t much I don’t know about that guy or haven’t already said. Not saying that I don’t have a lot of good friends that fall into that category, because I do.

Some of the best stories come out of the lives of people

who are NOT like me

But the great stories come from being friends with people like Casey. He is a 35-year-old disabled vet who grows his own organic fruits and vegetables and makes the best “Down On Your Knees” preserves you have ever eaten. Or Lesa, a middle-aged “young lady” who has competed in Ms. Georgia and in Ms. USA bodybuilder competitions, and is still a personal trainer for 20- and 30-year-olds.

Then there is Charles, a friend of mine who is a retired Vice President from Saint Louis University, Georgia Tech, and the University of Missouri-Columbia. Not long ago, Charles went hiking in the Beartooth Mountains in Montana with a friend carrying a 28 lb. backpack up to 10,400’, and camped for six days where he caught fish for his food. Now that is a story that people want to hear.

Still, there is something to be said about the ease of being with family or old friends. And yet, if we don’t work at it, the closest of friendships will become boring and even drift apart if you have nothing new to say to each other.

Last year, I called my 22 and 18-year-old grandsons and said, “Let’s go jump out of a plane, and I will pay for it.” Yes, we did that. How often do you see grandsons posting on Instagram and Facebook about what they did with their Papaw over the weekend?” That’s a story that will never grow old.

Recently, Jean and I started getting together with two other couples for early dinners and playing some games. I thought I had experienced some intense situations until I learned how to play “Hand and Foot” a few months ago. Don’t even get me started about Dominoes and the Mexican Train.

Another way I keep my conversations (and life) fun and exciting is by making active choices. When I retired, I started making decisions about how I would fill my day based on what would make the best story at the end of the day.

What makes for the best story usually makes for the best life.

Here is the way it works. When I get up in the morning, I ask myself, “Self, which would make the best story: sitting on the sofa and watching reruns of Poirot, or jumping in the truck and going for a three-hour drive to Tennessee, staying a couple of nights, and taking your 89-year-old mom out for her favorite meal at Cheddar’s? OR I ask myself, “Self, what would make for the best story, hang around the house today and trim the hedges, or go for a 3-mile hike to Amicalola Falls with your wife?”

Never let anyone else tell my story.

When I decided to jump out of a plane at 14,000 feet with my grandsons, many of my family and several friends called it silly, irresponsible, and unsafe. I certainly appreciated their concern because, after all, I have had two heart attacks, which led to 5 stents, and open heart surgery to replace my aortic heart valve. But after my heart doctor gave me the green light, “I” decided to do something that would give me a story that my grandsons and my family will laugh and tell for a long time after I am gone... and I have videos to prove it.

I will be sharing a great way to preserve and share some of our most precious stories during the Holidays.

Savoring every moment as I live out the “last best bite” of my life after 60.

A few of my little friends dropped by my house a while back and wanted to take a picture with me. When 5, 7, and 10-year-olds want to take a picture with a 70-year-old papaw, that is a story worth telling.